My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight lets celebrate not being married
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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