What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Randomize
