The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
you have to choose: penises or morals?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
