Pappa wants mamma naked
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Randomize
