38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
