eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
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