Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(815): View more from Illinois

Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.

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(480): View more from Arizona

With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.

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(248): View more from Michigan

Did you just see the Batmobile???

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(925): View more from California

just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook

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(510): View more from California

I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.

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(404): View more from Georgia

I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before

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(281): View more from Texas

When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.

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