i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Randomize
