drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize