I wanna bring you to show and tell
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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