It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
