Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
My dick has a subreddit
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.