my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
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I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Randomize