This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Randomize
