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• (818): View more from California

  he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.

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  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...

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• (310): View more from California

  I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (406): View more from Montana

  Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.

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