I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
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