this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
