so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize