The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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