Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
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