She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
