You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Floor bacon is actually really good
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
