Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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