Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
