I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i think my mom watched the whole time
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
