He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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