I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize