i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
