It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
What a dumb baby whore.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
