I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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