I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
