Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
