while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
