if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
