Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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