I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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