You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Dear god my vagina.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
