You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I bet he comes in French.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
