So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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