Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
