SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I love you.
Bad choice
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