Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize