I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
