carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Can I color on your dick again?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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