FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
