Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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