Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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