She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
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