I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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