He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize